Because people say you are supposed to reflect on the year...

As the New Year approaches, a lot of people look over the past year and reflect. I absolutely hate that idea, but I did it unwillingly this morning, and here is what I came up with.

1. My employer will not fire anyone. Does this stop me from working ridiculous hours? No. Why? I have no idea. I guess I need to get a better grasp on my work/life balance… especially since I would have to go completely crazy before they let me go.

2. You can’t make someone like you. It’s kinda like the song: I Can’t Make You Love Me If You Don’t by Bonnie Rait. Not that I’m looking to make anyone love me, but I think it goes the same for friendships, work relationships, or anything. If someone doesn’t like you, there isn’t a way to make them. It’s only taken me about 25 years to figure that out, but I think that puts me pretty far ahead of the game compared to some people. I have never referenced Bonnie Rait before, and hopefully when I reflect on this fairly lame blog, I will realize that I should never do it again.

3. Running a marathon isn’t that hard. Yeah, it takes a little bit of commitment and a nice pair of running shoes, but that’s about it. Don’t ever think otherwise. Marathoners want you to think that it’s some difficult feat... it’s just not.

4. I have spent countless hours thinking about and going out with men that I truly don’t care about. It was brought to my attention the other day that I have not dated someone I actually care about it quite some time. Sure, I go out with people and have fun, and if I don’t go out with them, how am I going to know if I will end up caring about them, but overall, I accept a date for the fact that later on will be a good story to tell. My dating has now turned into entertainment. Yes, I think that dating should be entertaining, but I shouldn’t be dating someone just to be entertained. I even accept dates with people that I know are completely emotionally unavailable because it makes it easier for me to focus on the entertainment. Of course I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, but when the guy doesn’t really care about me anyway, it’s much less likely that I will hurt his feelings. Now that I have realized this in my painful reflection of the year, what am I going to do about it? Well, absolutely nothing. Why do you ask? Because who the hell wants to date a Texan anyway!

5. Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream always makes everything better… even if you are lactose intolerant.

6. Most people in the world are good at heart. I know, I sound like Anne Frank, but I’m not hiding in an attic, so there’s a bit of a difference. I’ve run in to many people over the past year that mean well. Most people want to help, be a friend, and make other’s have a better life. The people you run in to on a daily basis that cause you grief are probably just having a rough day.

7. Celebrity gossip will age you. If you are caught up in what all the celebrities are doing, you miss out on your own life.

8. Playing with dogs will always put a smile on my face.

So I guess those are the things that I have reflected on this morning when I have looked back at my year. I am sure that I could come up with many more lessons, but that would require me to spend more than 10 minutes on this. It would also require me to reflect more, and I don’t really think that’s something I’m going to do, so hopefully this wonderful insight will work. I know… I am so insightful, right?

Children and elderly need to be kept under control...

So it’s been awhile. I’m not really good at keeping up with anything, let alone a blog that no one really reads. What have I been doing that has kept me away from rambling about the awkwardness of my life? Nothing really. I guess I just ramble about my awkwardness to different people so I haven’t had time to write it down. I was training for a marathon. I completed it about a month ago. I finished it under my goal time, which was really cool. I would actually do another marathon. It was pretty fun. Everyone was overly friendly though. I mean, just because we are running the same race doesn’t mean I need to know your life story. There were 33,000 people running the race. If I cared about each person’s reason for running the race, I would still be in San Antonio listening to everyone’s story of triumph.


The cool part about the race was that we got to enjoy the city before I ran. My mom came to visit and we did some site seeing. We got to check out a couple of the missions in San Antonio. They were pretty interesting. There was a lady with a small child in one of the sanctuaries. The child decided it was a good idea to scream… I think it was because he liked hearing it echo. Rather than stop the kid from screaming or bring the child outside, the mother just looked at us, then looked at the kid and said “A little quieter honey”. WHAT?!? A little quieter? How about “don’t scream or you will get it”? That’s gonna stop the kid from screaming. The child kept screaming and rather than do anything about it, the mother just ignored him. Yeah, my mom had to stop me from going over there to let the kid know that it was not appropriate to scream. The child was at least 4 years old… old enough to know right and wrong, that’s for sure. Now I believe in God, but I’m not very religious, so the only option we had was to get out of God’s House to avoid the child. Totally ridiculous. The grounds of the missions were beautiful, minus the “historic” coke machine that was in the sleeping areas. Really? Did they need to add a coke machine out in the mission area? Could they not have just kept them at the visitors center? It was difficult to photograph much of the mission because there were so many elderly people wandering around peering at everything. Even when they noticed that I was taking a picture, they just apologized and walked through it. Why even apologize then? So confusing.


So I guess there is no point to my story other than: I haven’t written in my pointless blog for quite some time. I went to San Antonio to run a marathon. It was fun. Kids need to be kept under control. So do the elderly. :)

You can have your cake and eat it too...

I baked a cake. Yellow cake with fudge frosting. It is amazing. I told someone about it and they told me that they didn’t believe me. Why would I bring up the fact that I made a cake if I didn’t actually make one?!? They said “ha ha… if you mean bought when you say baked then I believe you. You just don’t seem like the domestic type” Um, no, I mean I baked an effing cake. This is stupid to be annoyed with, but I’m not bad at baking and I have no clue why someone would assume I’m not domestic just because I don’t walk around wearing an apron with flour all over myself. This certainly means that I’m not interested in sharing my cake though. I know it sounds really bitter, but I just don’t feel like I should have to prove my baking abilities to people. I don’t go around telling people that I’m an amazing baker… it’s even more funny because I’m getting defensive about a cake that I made from a box mix. I usually bake from scratch and when people say something, I don’t even care, but I think this was the cake that broke the fat girl’s scale. I kept thinking about the wonderful cake all day while I was at work and how I wasn’t going to share it with anyone. Sure, I’m resentful. Not only that, I will make sure that person doesn’t get any holiday cookies either.

Weddings are the new trend? How about crack instead...

A lot of my friends are getting married lately. Well I guess I should correct that. A lot of my acquaintances are getting married. A lot of my friends are still single (thank goodness). Here’s my issue with the whole “getting married” thing: People look at me like I should be getting to that stage in my life and that I should be settling down with that special someone. That I should stop having ice cream and wine for dinner and start cooking casseroles or something. I wouldn’t call myself trendy, but I’m willing to join in if I think something is worth while. The thing with this trend is that I am not the only one to decide that I can be a part of this. It takes more than one person to make this choice. I’m all about jumping on that band wagon if I found the right person. That’s the issue… can’t find the right person. Why can’t my friends get into some other trend, like crack? That’s something I can buy into! I mean sure, it’s going to be an expensive habit, but at least everyone can be a part of it. Everyone can snort some lines and be a part of the cool crowd. Not only that, crack doesn’t make me plan a giant ceremony that everyone dreads going to just to watch me dress up and kiss someone. Nope, crack lets me kiss anyone and dress up whenever I want. It might be a little rough the further the trend goes when some friend starts stealing my tv to get a fix, but that is a risk I’m willing to take.

Because hiking in Texas isn't really hiking...

So I went hiking the other day. I think hiking in the area where I live is kind of a joke. It's all pretty flat. It was a gorgeous day, but it wasn't anything too challenging. There are no hills or mountains or any obstacles really-except the warning of the ocassional alligator. Overall, hiking here is more like a relaxing Sunday stroll through the woods. So this old couple comes up to me at the trail head and asks if I need any help finding the trail I want. They explained that they hike there frequently and know the trails like the back of their hand. So I tell them I want to go on the 6 mile hike and point it out on the map. With that, they take one look at me and tell me that I should re-evaluate my decision and maybe go on the .5 mile hike around the lake. I have no idea what that is supposed to mean, but I'm assuming these old folks with their great outdoorsy outfits and matching walking sticks don't think I can handle a longer hike. Apparently I don't look like the "outdoorsy type". I thanked them for their advice and walked in the opposite direction to the trail I originally wanted to go one. I survived. It was actually a pretty trail and I didn't encounter any alligators (thank goodness... I would have froke out). I did run in to a deer, a lizard, and one very scary armadillo. What an adventure. I also saw the old couple as I was leaving the trails. I told them that I somehow survived the long hike... even without the aid of a walking stick.

Maybe I should explain myself. That will make things more awkward...

I’m going to start this off with an explanation. I talk a lot. I have a lot of ideas that float around in my head. I’m awkward. I have plenty of opinions and most of them are contradictions. I’m doing this anonymously for the sheer fact that I don’t need to tell everyone who I am. If my friends or family would happen to stumble on this site, they would know it’s me in a heartbeat. If I collected them in one room, they would probably be able to combine all the stories I have told them and make this themselves. It’s not that I’m shy or that I don’t share my thoughts or feelings, I just think that people don’t listen enough sometimes and I have a whole load of things to say. Nothing that I say is going to be profound. Nothing is going to be poetic. Just my day to day life encounters and thoughts spewed out onto this page. Take them or leave them.